


Sweetest Devotion

by WritingBarnes



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-07
Updated: 2016-04-07
Packaged: 2018-05-31 18:43:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 5,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6482692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WritingBarnes/pseuds/WritingBarnes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>will add artist's artwork later.</p>
    </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> will add artist's artwork later.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You will only be eternally the one that I belong to."
> 
> Bucky's favorite kisses with Natasha, comprised into a 5 chaptered story.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lovely Artwork by Agentqarter on Tumblr

 

Bucky loved kissing Natasha. Kissing Natasha felt like home. It felt right. Bucky told her once and she laughed, her eyes crinkled in happiness as she pulled him into a soft kiss. You feel like home too, James, she told him in a whisper. This was one of his favorite kisses. It was soft, gentle, and filled with emotion, as if words are not enough to express how much they love each other. _It was not,_ he thought to himself. He loved this kind of kisses. She would let out a soft giggle when they broke apart, faces flushed.

 

“I love you, James Buchanan Barnes.” She told him, her green eyes pierced his grey-blue eyes. She caressed his cheek with her hand, her swollen lips curled into a fond smile. “I love you so much it hurts.”

 

And Bucky swallowed the lump in his throat while he pulled her closer. She was small against his muscular body. Bucky loved that about them. They fit together like two pieces of puzzle. He felt her lips on his collarbone and he pressed his lips on her head.

 

“I love you, Natalia.” He fervently whispered, lips brushing against her left ear.

 

* * *

 

It was the kind of kisses they have when they were not away on a mission. Good days, Natasha told him with her playful smile. They snuggled together on the bed, eyes glued on the television in front of them. Then Bucky would dip his head down to kiss her, smiling when she let out a soft moan. He loved it. He loved the way her body pressed against him, the way she wrapped her arms around his neck to pull him closer. He loved the way her cheeks pinked. He loved the way her chest rose as she stared back at him with loving eyes.

 

It was the kind of kisses that made him weak in the knees. He could savor the taste of her lips, how soft it was when she kissed him. He memorized the way she moved. He pulled her into his lap and traced patterns on her waist with his thumbs as he deepened the kiss. She chuckled when they pulled apart, both feeling lightheaded after the kiss.

 

“Hey.” She said.                                                                                                                                  

 

“Hey.” He looked at her, flashing a lopsided grin she loved so much. She kissed the corner of his mouth and got off his lap.

 

He felt his heart soar as he watched her turned to him. Her face was bright with mirth and a smile tugged at her lips. _God, I love her so much,_ he thought as his eyes wandered to her nose and her lips and back to her eyes.

 

“Breakfast?” She gave him a smile as she got out of the bed to grab the shirt he threw on the floor last night.

 

Bucky nodded and trailed behind her, not forgetting to wear a pair of boxer before he left the bedroom. They walked over to the kitchen, both at ease with each other as they did their morning routines. Natasha and the huge pot of coffee; Bucky with the pancake batter. She would watch him flipped over the pancakes, laughing quietly to herself when he almost dropped the pancakes.

 

“Stop showing off, James.”

 

“You love it.” He quickly replied with a smirk.

 

* * *

 

She did. She could watch him cook and never get bored of it. He would press his lips into a thin line as he concentrate on putting the right amount of batter to the pan. She adored this part of him. The old Bucky Barnes that came out whenever he felt happy and safe. It was not always like this so she was always grateful whenever they had this kind of good day.

 

“James?” She called him, smiling when he hummed in reply.

 

“I love you.” She said, studying the way his body tensed for a moment before it relaxed, the way blood rush to his cheeks as he muttered a reply, and the awkward gesture he did when he was caught off-guard. It was the most adorable thing she has ever seen. Natasha just loved him so much it hurts.

 

She quietly ate the slice of pancake he put on her plate, her eyes fixed on his figure. Steve had told her how grateful he was to see Bucky happy. He has been through a lot and I’m glad he found you, he told her once. Natasha walked home with teary eyes that day. She couldn’t tell Steve that she was the lucky one, that Bucky saved her from her nightmare.

 

“What are you thinking?” His voice snapped her out of her train of thoughts.

 

“Nothing.” She said after a beat of silence. She didn’t have to say it. He already knew. She could see it in his eyes, the way they lit up and shone. He leaned over and planted a kiss on her lips. She loved this as well. The sweet kiss that tasted like maple syrup and coffee.

 

“What’s that for?” She asked him when he pulled away.

 

He shrugged and went back to his pancake. The metal plates on his left arm shifted as he skillfully flipped over the pancakes. Natasha couldn’t hide her smile when she saw him stole a glance at her.

 

“What?” She raised an eyebrow in amusement when he quickly turned back around. _Some assassin you are,_ she snorted.

 

“I’m a lucky guy.” He finally said, turning his head back towards her. There was so much love in his gaze it brought tears to her eyes. She blinked back the tears before she got up from her chair and close the distance between them.

 

“And I’m a lucky woman.” She smiled before tiptoeing to kiss him on the lips. _Some things couldn’t be expressed with words_ , she realized. Bucky turned off the stove. His right hand moved to her waist while his left cradled her neck, pulling her closer.

 

It was a good day.


	2. Chapter 2

If there was one thing Bucky learned from his 90-something years of living, it was that good thing never lasts very long.

 

Bucky woke up the next morning with a crawling sensation on his skin. He could hear the pounding of his heart in his ears and everything just felt…too much. He blinked hard and gritted his teeth, trying not to wake Natasha with this… this _thing_. He clenched his fists and quietly slipped out of the bed and made his way to the bathroom.

 

He locked himself inside and slid down to sit on the cold tiles. _Don’t make a sound_ , he told himself as he bit his inner cheeks. Natasha was still asleep and she didn’t need to wake up to this. She had her fair share of hurt and pain and Bucky didn’t want her happiness to be tarnished by him. He pulled his knees to his chest and buried his face in his arms. _It’s okay. It’s just a bad day. It’ll be over soon_ , he repeated as he closed his eyes. Bucky tried to think of other things, tried to stop imagining the blood soaking his hands or the empty dead eyes of his targets. But the cold tiles of his bathroom reminded him of the icy cold of the cryo-chamber they put him in when he was done with a mission and his body shook in panic. He squeezed his eyes shut, trying to remember the taste of Natasha’s soft lips against his, the way her hands rested on his shoulders as she pulled him closer, the warmth of her body when she lied on top of him, the way she whispered ‘I love you’s.

 

“James?” He startled at the sound of her muffled voice. His back hit the wall behind him as he took a sharp intake of breath.

 

“Don’t come inside.” He rasped out between his sobs. He didn’t even realize he was crying until his hands touched his wet cheeks.

 

Natasha, being the person that she was, didn’t even bother to listen to him. She picked the lock in record time and sauntered inside (Bucky didn’t know if he love or hate this). She kneeled in front of him, her lips twisted into a warm smile she reserved just for him.

 

“Hey, you.”

 

“Hey.” Bucky quietly replied after a long moment, his hand slowly reaching out to hold hers. She gave it a gentle squeeze before pulling him into a hug.

 

“I love you, James Buchanan Barnes.” She whispered when she pulled away. She cupped his jaw and planted a kiss on his lips.

 

* * *

This wasn’t like the kisses they shared when they were happy. It was messy and salty with tears. It was a promise to better days. He dug his fingers on her hips, knowing it would leave bruises later, bruises that made him feel guilty for days. But Natasha never minded. She knew he needed this. He needed to know that he was human and not a machine like they told him. He needed to _feel_ something.

 

It was the kind of kisses that left him breathless. The kisses that made his knees weak and made his heart thundered against his ribcage. She would tilt her head a little to deepened the kiss, her hands wrapped around his neck as she pulled him closer. Her lips trailed down his neck and he let out a shuddery breath.

 

“Nat.” He managed to say between his breaths.

 

“Hm?” She hummed a reply, lips still attached to his jaw.

 

“Thank you.”

 

She quickly pulled away to look into his grey eyes. Her messy hair and swollen lips made him smile. Natasha. His Natasha, he thought as he gently caressed her cheek with his thumb. She shifted on his lap and rested her hands on his naked chest. The smile she gave him afterwards made him cry for another ten minutes. He was loved, she told him until both of them were too busy kissing and mapping each other’s bodies to speak.

 

* * *

 

It was also the kisses he gave her when he found her inside their closet next week after a particularly traumatizing mission. It was the kind of kisses he gave her to stop her body from shaking. It was rough, open-mouthed kisses, with their tongues and teeth clashing against each other, as if trying to reassure each other that they were humans and capable of _this_ , of love.

 

They would end up on the bed with clothes strewn everywhere. She would swung her leg over his and put her head on his chest, fingers tracing circular pattern on his left arm.

 

“Thank you.” She whispered, voice soft and hoarse from last night’s activity.

 

Bucky hummed a reply and kissed the top of her head.

 

* * *

 

 _It’s okay,_ he thought as he slowly closed his eyes, reveling in the warmth of her body. Good things might not last for long but at least they still have each other.

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

Bucky Barnes also loved the fact that Natasha could kiss him like there was no tomorrow. It was the kind of kiss that took him into a whole new level of breathlessness. He could hear the pounding of his heart against his ribcage as he stared into her green eyes and she would smile at him like he was the best thing that has ever happened to her (he was sure it was the other way around). Her eyes would be bright with fresh tears and Bucky’s heart twisted a little at the sight.

 

“I love you, James Buchanan Barnes.” She whispered.

 

* * *

 

The first time it happened, he was in the medical wing of Avengers Tower with bruised ribs and a gunshot wound near his heart.

 

He was supposed to infiltrate a suspected HYDRA base 24 hours earlier and steal a hard drive from the main office on the top floor. It was an extremely easy mission. He has done it a dozen of times he could even do it with his eyes closed. He stealthily entered the building and located the main office to grab the hard drive. Everything went smoothly until he left the room. He was on his way out of the building when he felt the bullet penetrating his chest. He let out a sharp gasp and fell down the flight of stairs. It took him a good ten minutes to take out his guns and killed the incoming agents.

 

Bucky had a vague memory of how he managed to get out of the building. He remembered Steve running towards him and helping him up, muttering some curse words that would make Bucky laugh if it weren’t for the bullet wound. He also remembered that it took them twice as long to get back to the quinjet. He could see Natasha’s blurry face on the monitor, eyes filled with worry as she spoke to his best friend who was busy pressing his hand on Bucky’s wound. Natasha’s panicked face was the last thing he remembered before he blacked out.

 

* * *

 

_He was no longer in the quinjet when he woke up. The bed felt too soft, which could only mean this was the hospital room in the tower. Bucky slowly blinked his eyes, wincing when the light almost blinded his eyes._

_“James.” Oh, how he missed this voice, he thought as he quietly turned to his right. Natasha was sitting on the wooden chair, her hair tied into a messy ponytail, and he thought she was wearing his sweater that day._

_“Hi.” He croaked out, lips curling into his trademark smirk._

_He let out a raspy laugh when she lunged herself at him, wrapping her arms around his neck and pulling him into a deep kiss. She would pull away just a little to whispered his name fervently before she leaned in to kiss him again. He never knew why. He was just happy she was there with him and he was alive._

_“I love you.” She smiled at him, her hands gently brushing away the strands of hair covering his face._

_Bucky felt another twist in his heart when his eyes went down to her trembling lips. I’m fine. I’m okay now, sweetheart, he told her. She would shook her head and gave him another kiss._

_“I love you.” She whispered, as if reciting a prayer. He mumbled a reply with a sleepy smile on his face, too happy to see her to notice her shaky hands._

* * *

 

It took him two more trips to the hospital wing, and a close brush with death to realize that this wasn’t a happy kiss. That this was never a happy kiss. This wasn’t a kiss she would give him when he came back from a mission. This kiss was painful. It was a reminder, a little prayer, a sign that he was still here and hers to love. He thought it was ridiculous. _There was no way I can ever leave you, Natalia._ He said when he noticed the way her hand shook whenever she tried to touch him. She didn’t say anything. She never needed to. He could read her like the back of his hand. So he reached out to touch her cheek and gently pulled her into another kiss. A sweeter kiss promising more tomorrows and more laughter.

 

* * *

 

Natasha never realized how terrified she was of losing James until she saw him bleeding out on the quinjet. His face was pale and his eyes were closed. There was blood everywhere and she forgot how to breathe for a minute when Steve looked up with equally terrified eyes.

 

“He’s going to be okay.” Helen Cho said while prepping James to the table. Natasha repeated the words over and over again until the surgery was over, until her throat went dry and she was too tired to stay awake.

 

She didn’t notice how shaky her hands were until James wrapped her hands with his and pulled her into a hug. He was going to be okay, she repeated in her head. James still smelled like gunpowder and mint and he was going to be okay. She let him pull her into another kiss. A sweeter kiss that made her stomach fluttered. _I love you, Natalia_. He smiled and let out a soft chuckle when she hummed a reply.

 

* * *

 

_Natasha didn’t know how painful the kiss could be until she got herself shot and almost died on the operating table. James was sitting on the wooden chair she usually sat on, eyes red and swollen, his lips trembling as he watched her wake up. He shakily reached out his hand to touch her bruised cheek, lips slowly curved into a smile._

_“Natalia.”_

_Oh. She thought to herself, feeling her heart twisted painfully at how broken her James looked right now._

_He kissed her slowly and she was reminded of the times she kissed him this way. A kiss filled with fear and relief, with love and anger, with so many unsaid things._

_“God, I thought I was going to lose you.” Bucky shakily said._

_“I’m not going anywhere, James.” She replied, eyes watching the way his face slowly light up like the fourth of July. Oh, the things she’d do to make sure he would always have that smile on his face._

_“Not even gods can separate us.” She added with a tiny smile of her own._

 

 

Chapter 4

 

This was a different kind of kiss, Bucky thought to himself. Smile curled up his lips as he set the plates on their dining table. It was different but he loved it just the same.

 

* * *

_Natasha would do anything if it meant her James would be safe from HYDRA and people who wanted him dead. She watched the last HYDRA agent dying in front of her with a satisfied expression on her face. This is what you get for trying to hurt James, she thought, eyes scanning the room filled with dead HYDRA agents. She has made a vow to protect James in the hospital room weeks ago after her close brush with death and she intended to keep it._

_“Natasha.” She turned around to find Steve standing by the door with a concerned look on his face._

_“I’ll be fine.” Natasha nodded as she made her way out of the room. “They’re dead. They can’t hurt James anymore.”_

 

This was the kind of kisses Bucky gave her when she came home after the mission with lips pressed into a thin line.

 

“Come here.” He told her, arms wide open, ready to wrap give her a tight embrace.

 

She stumbled into his chest, her tiny hands clutching his shirt tightly while they quietly stayed in the same position for a while.

 

It was the kind of kisses absently left on her forehead when they pulled apart. A silent I love you to make sure she knew how much he loves her.

 

“Come on, I made dinner.” Bucky mumbled into her hair, kissing the top of her head before they headed out to the kitchen.

 

* * *

 

Reassuring kisses. That was probably the right words to describe what this was. It was kisses he left on her cheek when she finally sat down after silently making sure everyone got their snacks. She would sat down on the couch, eyes glossed over her teammates while she slowly relaxed into his embrace.

 

 _She needed to know that she was no longer in the Red Room, where food was scarce and she had to fight other girls to get a piece of bread, Bucky thought._ He smiled down at her and kissed the top of her head as they turned their attention to the movie on the flat screen in front of them.

 

Bucky would take her hands and absentmindedly played with it, peppering it with kisses when no one was looking or giving it a gentle squeeze when she tensed a little.

 

“Stop being so sickeningly sweet, Barnes.” Tony rolled his eyes when he caught Bucky kissing Natasha’s cheeks for the third time during the movie night.

 

“Jealous, Stark?” Natasha raised an eyebrow and smirked at her friend. A bubble of laughter escaped her lips when Bucky decided to pepered her face with kisses in front of scandalized Tony Stark.

 

“Disgusting.” Tony shook her head.

 

“I don’t know. I think it’s cute.” Steve quipped from the other side of the couch.

 

“It’s revolting, Rogers.” Clint retorted with a disgusted expression that could rivaled Tony.

 

Bucky would’ve listened to the rest of their banter if he weren’t too distracted by the huge smile on Natasha’s face.

 

* * *

 

It was kisses she left on his cheek when she found him napping on their couch a week later. Their cat blearily opened its eyes and curled against Bucky’s arm when Natasha petted its head.

 

“Hello.” Bucky sleepily smiled.

 

“Hey, you.” Natasha kneeled on the floor and leaned closer to kiss him again. She ran her fingers through his incredibly soft hair, chuckling when he let out a contented sigh.

 

“You’re just like Flounder.” She mused, pointing her finger at the grey cat with weird markings they adopted few days ago.

 

Bucky mumbled something under his breath as he scratched the cat’s ear.

 

“How’s your day?” He finally opened an eye.

 

Natasha shrugged as she sat down on the wooden floor. Bucky’s eyes were fixed on her while she bit her lips, trying to think about her day.

 

“I missed you.” She finally said.

 

“I missed you too, darling.” Bucky smiled and sat up to kiss her forehead. She hummed a reply and rested her head on the couch.

 

* * *

 

It was kisses she gave him when Bucky brought home a huge bouquet of flowers a week later. Bucky laughed while she flung herself at him, showering him with kisses, eyes bright with mirth.

 

“No one has ever gotten me flowers before.” Natasha confessed while putting the flowers on the vase. “Not like this.”

 

“Well, get ready for more flowers then.” Bucky replied, leaning over the counter to kiss her nose. “I’m getting you so many flowers you’ll get sick of them.”

 

The face Natasha made that moment made Bucky tear up a little. She leaned closer to rest her forehead on his and flashed him a small smile.

 

“I don’t think I can ever get sick of this, James.”

 

“Good, then.” Bucky cheekily smiled before capturing her lips, flowers soon forgotten.

 

* * *

It was kisses he gave her before he had to leave for a mission the next day; a chaste kiss on the forehead and a whisper of I love you that made her cheeks pinked.

 

“Will you be back for dinner?” She asked as she trailed behind him, smiled tugging at her lips at the sight of her boyfriend’s back.

 

“I hope so. Are you going to cook?” He paused on his track and turned to face her, face bright with excitement.

 

“Pasta?” Natasha offered with a playful smile. Bucky eagerly nodded and walked over to her to give her another kiss on her forehead.

 

“I’ll be home soon. I love you.” He mumbled against her skin. She closed her eyes for a few seconds, enjoying the smell of his aftershave and the coolness of his metal arm on her cheek. _God, I can live on the street as long as I have James with me,_ she thought to herself as she detangled herself away from him.

 

“I love you too, James. Be safe.” She replied.

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

This was a different kind of kiss, Bucky thought to himself. Smile curled up his lips as he set the plates on their dining table. It was different but he loved it just the same.

 

* * *

_Natasha would do anything if it meant her James would be safe from HYDRA and people who wanted him dead. She watched the last HYDRA agent dying in front of her with a satisfied expression on her face. This is what you get for trying to hurt James, she thought, eyes scanning the room filled with dead HYDRA agents. She has made a vow to protect James in the hospital room weeks ago after her close brush with death and she intended to keep it._

_“Natasha.” She turned around to find Steve standing by the door with a concerned look on his face._

_“I’ll be fine.” Natasha nodded as she made her way out of the room. “They’re dead. They can’t hurt James anymore.”_

 

This was the kind of kisses Bucky gave her when she came home after the mission with lips pressed into a thin line.

 

“Come here.” He told her, arms wide open, ready to wrap give her a tight embrace.

 

She stumbled into his chest, her tiny hands clutching his shirt tightly while they quietly stayed in the same position for a while.

 

It was the kind of kisses absently left on her forehead when they pulled apart. A silent I love you to make sure she knew how much he loves her.

 

“Come on, I made dinner.” Bucky mumbled into her hair, kissing the top of her head before they headed out to the kitchen.

 

* * *

 

Reassuring kisses. That was probably the right words to describe what this was. It was kisses he left on her cheek when she finally sat down after silently making sure everyone got their snacks. She would sat down on the couch, eyes glossed over her teammates while she slowly relaxed into his embrace.

 

 _She needed to know that she was no longer in the Red Room, where food was scarce and she had to fight other girls to get a piece of bread, Bucky thought._ He smiled down at her and kissed the top of her head as they turned their attention to the movie on the flat screen in front of them.

 

Bucky would take her hands and absentmindedly played with it, peppering it with kisses when no one was looking or giving it a gentle squeeze when she tensed a little.

 

“Stop being so sickeningly sweet, Barnes.” Tony rolled his eyes when he caught Bucky kissing Natasha’s cheeks for the third time during the movie night.

 

“Jealous, Stark?” Natasha raised an eyebrow and smirked at her friend. A bubble of laughter escaped her lips when Bucky decided to pepered her face with kisses in front of scandalized Tony Stark.

 

“Disgusting.” Tony shook her head.

 

“I don’t know. I think it’s cute.” Steve quipped from the other side of the couch.

 

“It’s revolting, Rogers.” Clint retorted with a disgusted expression that could rivaled Tony.

 

Bucky would’ve listened to the rest of their banter if he weren’t too distracted by the huge smile on Natasha’s face.

 

* * *

 

It was kisses she left on his cheek when she found him napping on their couch a week later. Their cat blearily opened its eyes and curled against Bucky’s arm when Natasha petted its head.

 

“Hello.” Bucky sleepily smiled.

 

“Hey, you.” Natasha kneeled on the floor and leaned closer to kiss him again. She ran her fingers through his incredibly soft hair, chuckling when he let out a contented sigh.

 

“You’re just like Flounder.” She mused, pointing her finger at the grey cat with weird markings they adopted few days ago.

 

Bucky mumbled something under his breath as he scratched the cat’s ear.

 

“How’s your day?” He finally opened an eye.

 

Natasha shrugged as she sat down on the wooden floor. Bucky’s eyes were fixed on her while she bit her lips, trying to think about her day.

 

“I missed you.” She finally said.

 

“I missed you too, darling.” Bucky smiled and sat up to kiss her forehead. She hummed a reply and rested her head on the couch.

 

* * *

 

It was kisses she gave him when Bucky brought home a huge bouquet of flowers a week later. Bucky laughed while she flung herself at him, showering him with kisses, eyes bright with mirth.

 

“No one has ever gotten me flowers before.” Natasha confessed while putting the flowers on the vase. “Not like this.”

 

“Well, get ready for more flowers then.” Bucky replied, leaning over the counter to kiss her nose. “I’m getting you so many flowers you’ll get sick of them.”

 

The face Natasha made that moment made Bucky tear up a little. She leaned closer to rest her forehead on his and flashed him a small smile.

 

“I don’t think I can ever get sick of this, James.”

 

“Good, then.” Bucky cheekily smiled before capturing her lips, flowers soon forgotten.

 

* * *

It was kisses he gave her before he had to leave for a mission the next day; a chaste kiss on the forehead and a whisper of I love you that made her cheeks pinked.

 

“Will you be back for dinner?” She asked as she trailed behind him, smiled tugging at her lips at the sight of her boyfriend’s back.

 

“I hope so. Are you going to cook?” He paused on his track and turned to face her, face bright with excitement.

 

“Pasta?” Natasha offered with a playful smile. Bucky eagerly nodded and walked over to her to give her another kiss on her forehead.

 

“I’ll be home soon. I love you.” He mumbled against her skin. She closed her eyes for a few seconds, enjoying the smell of his aftershave and the coolness of his metal arm on her cheek. _God, I can live on the street as long as I have James with me,_ she thought to herself as she detangled herself away from him.

 

“I love you too, James. Be safe.” She replied.

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

Of all the kisses he’s had with Natasha, Bucky Barnes’ favorite kiss would have to be their first kiss in the 21st century. It was far from romantic. It was chaste and most importantly, it was more of an accident than a real kiss. It was nothing, Natasha would say whenever he brought it up. But her cheeks would turn into an adorable shade of pink and Bucky would laugh and pulled her into a kiss. Whatever you say, darling, he always replied, ignoring Natasha’s incoherent muttering.

 

* * *

 

_They have been getting closer the past months (courtesy of Steve’s excitement to see them together) and Bucky knew how fucked he was when it comes to Natasha. They occasionally flirted with each other, much to their teammates’ discomfort. It was nice hanging out with Natasha, Bucky told Steve once when his best friend asked him about their relationship._

_“But do you like her?” Steve asked with raised eyebrows._

_“I don’t know.” Was his only reply but even an idiot could see the blush rising up his cheeks and the way his eyes brighten up whenever they mentioned Natasha in a conversation._

_“Okay.” Steve shrugged, hiding a smile as they entered the gym._

_Natasha was already there, hair tied into a ponytail. She was wearing a pair of leggings and t-shirt Bucky found really adorable (It was a grey shirt with a huge red star in the middle). Bucky quickly jogged towards her to greet her with his usual smile of his and Steve was sure he saw Natasha’s face lit up that day._

_“Hi.” Bucky smiled._

_“James. Sparring today?” She grinned, eyes darting towards Steve to acknowledge his presence._

_“You bet, doll.” Bucky offered a hand to help her up. Her hand felt warm against his and he was struck with a sudden realization. It has always been this way, he thought as he watched their intertwined hands. Feeling like home, like he belonged. Bucky pushed away the fluttering feelings and gave his friends another smile._

_“Watch the professionals do it, Steve.” He teased, laughing when Steve chucked his shoe at him._

_* * *_

_They were in the middle of sparring (more like he was lying on the mat while Natasha straddled his torso with a smirk on her face) when JARVIS requested Natasha’s presence for a mission brief._

_“Well, I better go now.” She got back on her feet and fixed her ponytail._

_“Dinner at 8?” Bucky asked her with a charmingly boyish smile on his face. He sat up, eyes watching Natasha’s face contorted into a thoughtful expression._

_“It’s a date. See you later, James.” She leaned down to kiss him on the lips. It only lasted for a millisecond before she pulled away, eyes wide in shock._

_“I better go.” She mumbled and quickly left the room, ignoring Bucky’s red face and Steve’s amused expression._

_“Well, that was quite a sight.” Steve’s voice brought him back. Bucky snapped his head towards his friend._

_“She just kissed me?” He said with a questioning look, as if unsure if this was a dream or not._

_“Yeah.”_

_“Holy shit.”_

_* * *_

_He nervously waited for her arrival in his apartment, hoping she didn’t bail out on their so-called-date. He didn’t know how long he has been trying to hold his breath until the doorbell rang at exactly 8 p.m._

_“You’re here.” Bucky breathed out in relief._

_“Of course. Where else would I be?” Natasha awkwardly smiled as she walked into the small apartment. She remembered it like the back of her hand. There were scenery paintings hung on the wall on her right next to bookshelves and the TV. The hall on her left would lead him to the dining room and the kitchen area. Contrary to popular beliefs, the whole apartment was filled with a lot of trinkets Bucky found interesting, from a tiny music box that reminded him of Natasha to the elephant-shaped coffee-table he found on the flea market months earlier. Natasha’s lips curved into a tiny smile as she scanned the whole room. She loved Bucky’s apartment. The creamed-colored walls made the place looked more homey than it already was._

_“You know—“ Bucky helplessly shrugged and Natasha couldn’t hold back the laughter bubbling in her throat._

_“I kinda like it.” She offered him a smile, which he quickly replied with his own._

_“I kinda like it too.” He nodded. He took a few steps towards her, closing the distance between them. His right hand went up to gently touch her cheek while he rested his left hand on her waist. “I’d like to do it again.”_

_“That would be very nice.” She cleared her throat._

_So he did. He dipped down to capture her lips. She tasted like the fruity candies she usually ate. Her lips were as soft and as intoxicating as he had remember. He smiled into the kiss and tilted his head a little to get a better angle._

_“That was really nice.” She whispered when the pulled back to breathe._

_“Yeah.” Bucky nodded with a goofy smile. Natasha’s face lit up and it was the most beautiful thing he has ever laid his eyes upon. Eyes bright, cheeks flushed red, lips swollen, hair strewn everywhere. “So, dinner?” He asked her after a beat._

_She let out a laugh and let him lead her back to the dining room._

_  
* * *_

“James?” Natasha’s concerned voice snapped him out of his train of thoughts. He looked up to see a pair of green eyes, staring at him in worry.

 

“I’m fine.” He smiled, pulling her onto his lap. “I was just thinking.”

 

“Hm?” She relaxed into his touch and rested her head on his shoulder. “Care to share?”

 

“Our first date.” Bucky answered after a long, comforting silence.

 

Natasha looked up with suspicious eyes, lips pursed into a pout.

 

“Please don’t tell me.” She mumbled, rolling her eyes when Bucky snickered.

 

“Oh, come on, doll. It was the best kiss I’ve had.” He wiggled his eyebrows.

 

“It’s stupid. I can’t even look Steve in the face for the rest of the week.” She replied.

 

Bucky looked down and raised his eyebrows. “You can act like nothing happened after Steve caught us having sex in that stupid closet but you can’t even look at him after that kiss?”

 

Natasha let out a groan and buried her face on his neck, mumbling something incoherent.

 

“I hate you.”

 

“I love you too, doll.” Bucky easily replied as he wrapped his arms around her.

 


End file.
